i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
