it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Randomize