So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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