i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
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