Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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