"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
