I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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