she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
