i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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