State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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