why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
