There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize