I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
ok first of all what the fuck
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
