Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I yelled at your uterus for you.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
