How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
