I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Randomize
