he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
