no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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