He is such a slut. More and more my type.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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