If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Every concussion has its silver lining
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
