Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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