my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
