shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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