He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
i believe in u and ur pee
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
