Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
