soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
