What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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