I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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