sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Drunk is a universal language darling
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
