were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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