I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
