It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
