There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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