don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
