Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
