Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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