I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize