i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
