how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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