Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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