the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
