So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize