Do you still have your period?
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
