I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
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