We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
