He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
thus making me awesome and them whores
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
