You can't special order awesome
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
third nipple confirmed
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
