i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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