it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
