I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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