she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize